A Heart in the Oven .

Dear God,


____________ is changing. My ____________ is changing. Things are just... changing. And I have no clue what is to happen next. I've never felt this way before, and I've never been at this point in my life before. I don't know why I'm here but I am and it's all a part of Your plan God.

But along the way sometimes I struggle with these changes. As people grow apart and as other grow closer, and as I continue to get more paranoid, I realize that I'm feeling emotions of ________ that I've either never really felt before or that I've never felt as strong before. And I don't really know what to do about them. These emotions sting as they sit on my heart. And they're not necessarily bad emotions, but it's like cooking a cake without a toothpick-- you never really know when it's actually done cooking or not, unless you stick your finger in there and screw up the whole cake. And my heart hurts once in a while as it sits here cooking, burning, changing, changing into something new and for the better I guess, but it still hurts cooking.

I always have to wonder which side is changing, though. Is it me, becoming stronger in certain emotions and weaker in others, or is it my surroundings changing? Am I revolving around my surroundings or are my surroundings and the people inside them revolving around me? I think I know the answer to that one but what I meant was, is the universe turning over a new side or am I? Or what if we're BOTH turning over a new side?

God, You know whats up. You're probably reading this letter thinking, "Come on __________, just hold on. It's all turning out for the better." You've told us that Love is patient. And I believe it. God, while these times are changing, or I'm changing, or whatever; while my heart is cooking to be something maybe new or for the better, I pray that You would give me the patience while I feel burned in certain areas of the process. And I pray that I could just love every minute of every day to the fullest, and every ONE to the fullest. And to never forget that You are in control... which is the best part.

Love, _____________